Ever since we moved to India six months ago, my mother’s favourite stress buster has been spending time with her grandchildren whenever time permits. So when last week looked promising enough to plan a getaway, we found her at our doorstep early in the morning – eyes gleaming with the anticipation of feeling two sets of little arms around her neck.
The kids did not disappoint.
They squealed with delight at the sight of their Ammamma and rushed to smother her with kisses and heartfelt declarations of love. Content at the scene unfolding before me (and accepting defeat in the face of a grandparent’s love), I slowly backed away into the kitchen to prepare something to eat. Picking up a bunch of lady’s fingers, I began to make quick methodic cuts to get a head start on breakfast. Presently, my mom came into the kitchen to lend a hand, examined the produce, and gave an audible gasp.
“Did you wash these before cutting them?”
Her tone sent me back twenty years to when I would do things that earned me a stern reprimand ever so often.
“Ummm… no?”
To say that my mother looked disappointed would be a huge understatement. She was seriously upset over my “lack of discipline in such a small thing”. She correctly pointed out that she had seen me exhibit the same behaviour in other instances in the past and was saddened that I would give this habit less importance that it deserved. I was a bit defensive to begin with but quickly agreed I was in the wrong. It was hard not to since the evidence was so obviously in her favour. There’s a lot of contact between the time the produce is grown in a field to the time in reaches our tables. There’s no way to know if those that have touched it before me were sick, if they were handled unsanitary or if they even washed their hands after using the bathroom. Not to mention, unwashed produce could lead to diseases like Salmonella, E.coli and Listeria.
My mom gave me a well-deserved lecture and proceeded to wash and towel dry each lady finger. As I shamefacedly slinked around the kitchen, I realised how big a blunder it was to try and shave a few moments off work when it came to such important things.
This little incident sent my head spinning thinking of all the ways it could reflect on a life of discipline (or lack of) overall. That is how discipline usually works, isn’t it? It is a controlled form of behaviour that is a mark of– and a way to develop – character. Development of meaningful and purposeful habits don’t tend to be a walk in the park. The Word of God itself states no discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it (Hebrews 12:11).
This brings me to the question – just how much discomfort do I put my body through on a daily basis to achieve a disciplined life? Because, let’s face it, nothing really worth having comes quickly and easily. Discipline is not a place or state you arrive at. It’s what you do – over and over again. The funny thing is, it’s so easy to fall off the wagon and return to our old, self-pleasing, destructive habits. However, it is so difficult to get back on track. This translates to all areas in our life. Despite having developed the discipline of waking up early in the morning, it is still very easy for me to sleep in till the cows come home if I were given the option. It is an exercise of the will to get off the couch and exercise but it takes no effort at all (and is quite enjoyable) to lounge around all day. In fact, despite having a clear understanding of how good exercise is for my body, I don’t always approach it with enthusiasm.
The wise disciple would choose discipline over desire every single time no matter how uncomfortable it is. Mark Matteson says it well : “Good habits are hard to form and easy to live with. Bad habits are easy to form and hard to live with. Pay attention. Be aware . If we don’t consciously form good ones, we will unconsciously form bad ones.” While this certainly holds true for earthly disciplines such as exercise, it is especially crucial to approach spiritual matters with uncompromising discipline. 1 Timothy 4:7–8 says, discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness [keeping yourself spiritually fit]. For physical training is of some value, but godliness (spiritual training) is of value in everything and in every way, since it holds promise for the present life and for the life to come. The road to become Christlike is a never-ending process for as long as we are on this side of eternity.
Every day must find us making conscious choices when it come to dying to ourselves and making consciously self-denying choices. “Free will has carried many souls to hell, but never a soul to heaven yet” (Charles H. Spurgeon). We cannot sit around all day expecting God to suddenly make us holy and to equip us to carry out His calling for our lives. Our active participation is required and even demanded. As the story goes, a young woman asked the great preacher Charles Spurgeon if it was possible to reconcile God’s sovereignty and man’s responsibility. “Young woman,” said he, “You don’t reconcile friends”.
I often wonder if I’ve ever known a man or woman who came to spiritual maturity except through discipline. I don’t believe I have. Godliness always comes through discipline. Finding a way out of discipline is simply too costly. I used to watch The Steve Harvey Show a while ago and something I heard really stuck with me. The host was responding to the question a lady put forth about her husband being too stern with their sons. Steve Harvey said, “ Ma’am, undisciplined men either end up in the hospital, or in a prison, or they end up in the grave. Let your husband discipline your boys.”
As Vance Havner succinctly put it, “The alternative to discipline is disaster”.
As believers, if we claim to know all of this, why do we approach our faith and our daily walk with God in such an offhanded manner? Why do we not immerse ourselves in our devotion to Christ or crave the wealth that His Word imparts? Why do we not commit ourselves to the discipline of meditation and live a determined life of uncompromising holiness? R. C. Sproul said it painfully well: “Here then, is the real problem of our negligence. We fail in our duty to study God’s Word not so much because it is difficult to understand, not so much because it is dull and boring, but because it is work. Our problem is not a lack of intelligence or a lack of passion. Our problem is that we are lazy.”
I have the tendency to beat myself up if I am not immediately perfect in everything I set out to do. But I’ve come to realise that not all situations work that way. While I might be great at some things even while starting out, others take a long time. This works out for good as well. Situations where I fall and lose my footing over and over are those that find me leaning heavily upon His grace. I have no choice but to rely on Him and to practice complete dependence. I know that He who promised is faithful and He will not let me go until he has accomplished what He placed me to do on this Earth. After all, it is He who promised me that His grace is sufficient for me; for His power in made perfect in my weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
It is good to remind ourselves often that anything that lets us to becoming more Christ-like is worth working hard for – indeed even dying for. Dearly beloved, you who belong to Christ, discipline yourselves to crucify the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we walk by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit (Galatians 5:24). When we apply our hearts to do His will day after day, there will come a time when we can cry out with joy, I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me (Galatians 2:20).
Now, excuse me while I wash the vegetables in preparation for dinner.