“How come you never hug our maid?”
I swerved around to find my five-year-old looking at me with inquisitive eyes.
“Excuse me?” I asked.
“How come you never hug our maid? Joseph repeated.
“Wh.. What do you mean?”
“You hug all the aunties I know”, Joseph reasoned, “but I’ve never seen you hug our maid. You hug Shalini aunty, Irine aunty…”
As Joseph continued to talk, my mind drifted. I wanted to ascertain if what Joseph was saying had an element of truth to it. I wondered if in some subconscious way, I thought that my maid didn’t really seem to have the need to be hugged. Did I reason that just because she was in a socially lower class than we were, I didn’t really want to break that unspoken barrier between us? Was the fact that she worked in multiple houses making me wary of having any physical contact with her? I ran through the recesses of my mind– struggling to find a reasonable explanation. I knew that I was genuinely grateful for her – she helps me with so much on alternate days. I knew that she was warm and sweet, and that I’m a hugger by nature. Had she indicated in any way that she was uncomfortable with physical contact, I would have totally respected that. But I never even tried. I failed to extend the same courtesy to her as I did to my friends.
I asked myself – Is it not important that those who do not yet know Christ experience His love through His disciples? What difference do I make if I greet and love only those who are within my “circle”? Does that not defeat the purpose of me being the salt of the world?
I am glad that my five-year-old brought this to light. The situation called for some serious amending and I was glad to have a young pair of eyes to monitor it. I realise that I might sound a tad dramatic when I call for some “serious amending” but I have been at the receiving end of kindness and love; and in certain circumstances, it was life-giving. As cliched as “preach the Gospel at all times; use words if necessary” is, it is absolutely right. Something within us must be so radically beautiful that the world must scramble to identify the source of that beauty. What a privilege it is to have that kind of light shining from within at all times! What opportunity it presents the Holy Spirit to lead others to Christ!
Matthew 18:1-4 reads – “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”
If we take God’s Word seriously, to mean exactly what it says, then it is apparent that we cannot even hope to see the pearly gates unless we become like children. Too often, too many of us forget what it was like to be a child. And in the times that we live in, we either too distracted or busy to appreciate the nature of children (even if they live under our roof).
To be a child is to have an entirely different perspective on the world. To a two-year-old child, his parents are paramount. To make the comparison easier, I’m going to say that his father is paramount. Everything in his world revolves around his Daddy – either knowingly or unknowingly. He goes to bed at night in perfect peace because he trusts Daddy will take care of him – there are no monsters that cannot be banished by the sound of His father’s voice. If he has a bad day, Daddy will certainly hear about it. If he has a good day, Daddy will hear about it. When he does something wrong, he can be assured that he can confidently let his father know without fear of rejection. A child sees a foe in nobody. He considers himself superior to nobody and does not make judgements on a person based on their social status, external appearance or their ability to speak English! He holds no grudges and harbours no hatred. A child holds on to materialistic things loosely but try prying him from the arms of his father! The child is not seen as great by anyone. He does not demand to be celebrated or to be held in esteem. He is content (jubilant even) to be in the shadow of his father and to tag along wherever he takes him. What manner of simplicity and meekness he exhibits! What joy bubbles from within him for the simplest of things!
Now that is what we must become in order to enter the kingdom of heaven. Christ must be celebrated and held in high esteem in our eyes. Every good thing we have must be acknowledged as having come from Him. With meekness, I accept that I am nothing without Him and thereby, there is no place for pride in my interactions with others. Every day we spend on this Earth must be seen as an opportunity given to please him – to bring joy to Him and glory to His name. Everything that I do as a Christian must reflect the singular goal of striving to please Christ. And so, I love. I love because that is what He requires of me – to love the Lord my God first and above all else and then to love my neighbour. Anybody He puts in my vicinity becomes my neighbour. And so I make the choice to love them. To love beyond race. Beyond colour. Beyond social constructs and societal segregations. Beyond the ability to speak a mutual language, beyond religious beliefs, and differing temperaments.
I came across this quote by Phil Steer recently that succinctly sums up what I’m trying to convey – “God sends little children to speak and act for him. In their simplicity and naivety they say and do things that we adults never would, but which can reveal deep truths about the way the world should be, if we only would have ears to hear and eyes to see. God sends children to speak into our world.”
I hugged my maid last evening. I thanked her whole heartedly for helping me out. She was visibly moved and warmly reciprocated the gesture.
I am so glad I had a child walk me through this.