I learnt more about Johnny Depp and Amber Heard the past couple of weeks than I ever thought was possible.
It’s my own fault. I watched excerpts from the courtroom until I could recognise every twitch and smirk between the sparring parties. When I had exhausted the number of clips I could watch without them getting repetitive and too meme-y, I read articles written by people weighing in on the case. I’m not proud of it but there were days when it was the first thing I looked up on as soon as I woke up. It got so bad that at one point I was glad that the time difference between Virginia and where we lived was advantageous to me getting my early morning fix of the Depp-Heard trial.
It was an endless loop of overwhelming curiosity and self loathing. It took away a lot of time and forced me to appease my conscience when I was reminded of Matthew 6:33 (But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well). I knew I was spending an ungodly amount of time on this but I felt like I couldn’t stop. I kept appeasing my conscience by convincing myself that once the verdict was announced, I would find closure. The Voice inside asked how either outcome would affect me but I drowned it out using feeble justifications. When the verdict was finally announced, I felt nothing. It wasn’t the “A-ha!” moment I was expecting, it was more of an “Ah-okay” moment. The only feeling I was left with was one of a crushing sense of my day-to-day dependence on unprofitable digital fodder for my eyes and mind.
I wish I were the only one struggling with this; struggling with the will (or lack thereof) to cultivate self-discipline. “We must face the fact that many today are notoriously careless in their living. This attitude finds its way into the church. We have liberty, we have money, we live in comparative luxury. As a result, discipline practically has disappeared. What would a violin solo sound like if the strings on the musician’s instrument were all hanging loose, not stretched tight, not “disciplined”? ” (A.W. Tozer)
If I spend the time given to me to fuel my penchant for being lazy, I will choose to scroll on my phone till the cows came home. I have a deep seated tendency to do this. However, if our propensity for wickedness (and wasting time is most certainly wicked) is high, then our cry for help must be incessant. Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. (Galatians 6:7-9)
Discipline.
I am reminded of a quote by C.S. Lewis : What saves a man is to take a step, then another step, then another step. It is always the same step, but you have to take it.” The Christian life is compared to a race, a marathon, that requires us to put one foot ahead of the other. We are expected to finish the race with integrity, without compromise or shortcuts. Sadly, many of us become discouraged along the way – we become weary of doing the right thing. We tend to become distracted – when we let our eyes wander from the path marked out for us, everything else seems bigger and more pressing.
But be very careful, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is (Ephesians 5:15-17). So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be awake and sober. (1 Thessalonians 5:6)
Dear believer, wake up! Be vigilant! Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:8). Do not be lulled into believing that what you feed your mind does not matter. A man reaps what he sows. Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it (James 4:17).
We were in church last week when I got to exchange a few words with the pastor’s wife. A sweet and soft-spoken lady, you’d never guess she had a superpower – the God given grace to lead a life of perpetual prayer. She said something unexpectedly that struck a chord with me –
“No prayer that we offer is wasted. Think of it like money, if you will. Sure, we carry around money to spend for our needs. But a wise man always saves some in the bank. It will always be of use – if not today, some other day.”
My mind immediately went to the parable of the ten virgins. They had one job – to be ready for the arrival of the bridegroom. While waiting for Him, all of them fell asleep. However, it wasn’t the sleep itself that determined who was wise and foolish. If anything, it emphasises just how long the bridegroom tarried. There was only detail that differentiated the two groups – the amount of oil they took. The foolish ones took only what was in their lamps, the wise took extra.
The problem wasn’t that the foolish virgins came unprepared, they weren’t prepared enough. They were ready to meet the bridegroom – as long as He returned within a specific window of time. They did not have enough oil to be prepared if he tarried. It is the parable of those who took time to prepare and those who didn’t. At the end of the day, that lack of preparation cost them everything. Jesus ends the parable by saying, “Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming”.
Watch, Christian. Build up your oil reserves.
Commonly used to symbolise the Holy Spirit, we learn clearly through the parable that the oil cannot be transferred from one person to another. We can build up our reserves by preparing ourselves spiritually for the return of the King. It is an intensely personal and specific resource. I cannot share my readiness with you and cannot expect your preparation to benefit me.
Let us learn a lesson from the wise virgins. Let us grow in prayer and feed on the Word of God. Let us go about doing good and encouraging those who are down. Let us spend our gifts to build the kingdom of God and spend much time setting our own heart right before God. It is neither easy nor simple – it is a lifelong commitment to following the footsteps of our Lord. God doesn’t expect us to be perfect in all these things but He does expect us to pursue them whole-heartedly till our last day on Earth. Don’t be disheartened, dearly beloved, just pursue them as best as you know. He will give you the grace and crown you with the perseverance needed to complete this journey victoriously.
We will rejoice on the other side of the door – inside the banquet hall when the Bridegroom finds us waiting and ushers us in. The look of love and pride in His eyes will erase every memory of our struggles here on Earth. For this “present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us” (Romans 8:18).
Father, I am so far away from where you want me to be. I have made a habit of falling into a life of lethargy when you want me to be alert and watchful. I only do the bare minimum of what I assume is required of me and am content to be lukewarm. Your Word tells me that you detest such an attitude and that such people can never enter the Kingdom of God. I want to be blameless before you, Father. I want to do my best and live a life that You are pleased with. Help me to lead a life that is disciplined and focussed. Give me the grace to be able to consistently put one foot in front of the other and to advance in this race marked out for me. I want to go from glory to glory, Father. I am tired of whiling away the time that you have so graciously given me. Help me to invest my days and time for the things of the kingdom. I shudder to think of the wrath that will fall upon me if I neglect the opportunities that you give me while I am on this Earth. May I make a sincere and whole-hearted attempt every day of my life to fulfil your purpose for placing me where I am. Please let me not live in a state of stupor with my mind numbed by futile and unprofitable distractions. May Your Holy Spirit enable me to run with perseverance this race marked out for me. To You be all the glory. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.
8 comments
Amen
Yes! No prayer we offer is wasted.
Continue ur good work dear..
Good one ! Keep it up eva
🙂
Thank you for sharing honestly your struggle. What you describe is the same for nextflix series : i binge watch and I am not even having satisfaction on the last episode as it usually finishes on a cliff hanger
It seems all entertainment is made on this pattern nowadays : addictive and disappointing ending.
I will try to be vigilant upfront : is this scrolling potentially addictive ? Could i be just disappointed when it ends ?
If so, let’s not even start.
You’re absolutely right, Delphine. It is an endless cycle of seeking joy that does not deliver.
Thank you for opening your struggle with us and praying about it afterwards. I too face the problem of wasting time on my phone, not because of the defamation case, but due to spending too much time on Instagram. While the parable, analogies, quotes and verses, together with the pictures, made this blog post more lively, your thoughts on the word of God and the word itself gave life – life to new motivation to live a life that is pleasing to God. Thank you again! I’m happy to have read your post ^^
God bless you, Gianna! May God bless you as you continue to grow in Him!
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