On Trading Diamonds for Dust

by Evangeline Samuel
On trading diamonds for dust

My son, Joseph, shares a beautiful relationship with my mother. They spend a reasonable portion of each day catching up with each other and making silly faces over video call. Sometimes, my mother hangs up on a video call almost as soon as she finds out that Joseph is either in kindergarten or asleep. “Why bother with the video? It’s just the two of us. Call me over audio“, she reasons.

Just this week, I handed him my phone when my mother called and they got into a lively discussion about dinosaurs. Five minutes later, they were comparing the shape of each others feet.

Clearly, they share an intimate bond.

However, this very child is prone to completely ignore his grandmother when he is occupied with his toys or cartoons. “Please wait, Ammamma“, he says, holding his palm up as he inspects something that’s caught his fancy. Even if my mother manages to lure him away from whatever he is engrossed in, she only gets half-hearted responses at best to all her queries.

I am often the same.

Many a time, things that I know that are fleeting and mundane often take much of the mental space that I should have rather reserved for the Lord. I am often reminded of Him throughout the day and I hurriedly give Him the attention that I can muster. However, I cannot possibly hope to develop an ever-increasing intimacy with the Lord without spending quality time with Him. The more I long for Him and develop a relationship with Him, the more I invite Him into my day-to-day activities.

Psalm 63 1 O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water.

My spiritual life has seen hills and valleys. Ups and downs. Dry periods of the soul and luscious periods of growth in the inner man. Do you relate to what I am saying? Do you sometimes tire of the fact that your spiritual life is not as consistent as you would like it to be?

When I find myself not as dedicated to my spiritual growth as I ought to be, I often wonder, am I truly aware of the richness that a relationship with the Lord imparts to my life?

If I were to suddenly find myself in the good graces of the mayor of my town tomorrow, I would make a constant effort to keep in touch with him. I would invite him and his family over for lunch and I would try to forge a friendship. Why? Because I know that having friends in high places might prove to be an invaluable asset.

This is how some of us approach God. It’s a poorly veiled attempt at trying to get into His good graces (as if that were possible!) to get something we want from Him. Once our desires are satisfied, we leave Him hanging until the next need comes along.

True believers, the ones who seek Him in spirit and in truth, can never be content with such a relationship. Instead, they are consumed with a kind of holy discontent. They are always on the pursuit of getting to know the Lord more. These believers seek God for Him. They long to experience Him for who He is – not for what He has. They are aware that relationships take time. They take effort and commitment. Although they start with a single conversation, they keep the flame burning every day by fueling it with time.

A relationship with God begins with a single conversation. But it takes discipline on our part to keep the flme burning by fueling it with time.

There was a time in my life when I was so intimately acquainted with God. In the wee hours of the morning, He seemed so close that I felt I could reach out and touch Him. He became soaked into the very fibre of my being. He had a role to play in everything I did. However, as the days went by, I stopped fueling that relationship with the time that it deserved. Sure, I loved the Lord and I wanted Him to sit on the throne of my heart but somehow, other things seemed more pressing. Other relationships, commitments, hobbies and interests took the place of what I had once assigned to the Lord. Today, I look back those days as the golden period of my spiritual life.

Am I truly aware of the richness that a cherished relationship with the Lord imparts to my life?

The words of Charles Spurgeon echo in my mind: “nothing teaches us about the preciousness of the Creator as much as when we learn the emptiness of everything else.”

I remember when I was young and my parents would leave my brother and I at home during our summer holidays when they went to work. Once my brother and I had exhausted every activity that we could do together, we would quickly get bored. Almost instinctively, I would pick up the phone to call my mother at work to find out when she would heed home and to fill her in on some of the details of our day. Then my brother would pry the phone from my hands and he’d have his turn. We did that because we were bored. We had had enough of each other and turned to our mother for companionship.

By and large, that’s the problem we are faced with now-a-days. We are almost never bored. Even if we do not seek the Lord because we delight in Him, we would have atleast sought after Him if we gave ourselves the time to think of Him. But we do not allow ourselves spare moments. The nifty smartphone becomes our invisible companion in every moment of loneliness, the dull blue light keeping us company throughout the day.

We are short-sighted. Earthy, temporal and fleshly things enjoy the bulk of our attention as “the Lord looks down from heaven upon the children of men, To see if there are any who understand, who seek God” (Psalms 14:2).

Thankfully, I know I belong to the Father of the prodigal son. When I lose sight of the vision that drew us to God, I am grateful that His arms and heart and always open to me, that His eyes are on the lookout for the dismal frame at the end of the road.

My Father, please stamp eternity on my eyelids. Give me an eternal perspective and teach me to realize the brevity of life, so that I may grow in wisdom. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

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